High Resolution

Photography by Tracey Rediker RedLincArt

It is now a whole new year. We survived 2016, congratulations. It is now time to set your goals for the better you that is sure to come.

I, too, fall into this trap against my better instincts. If you can call being an eternal pessimist “better instincts”. I do have that little piece that screams out from inside, “if you try hard enough things will change”. Isn’t that what people say?  That is a thing, I’m not making this up. People ACTUALLY believe that crap.

The truth is that things change every day. It is not because you did anything, it is called the passage of time. Science. Today is not yesterday whether you did exactly the same thing or not. Change is not going to fix anything.

So what then is the point for me of reflecting on the last year and looking forward to the new? It’s that damn little voice. I have this dream that one day that little voice will get bigger until it breaks though like the Hi-C man. He is there waiting to be called out but I don’t want to have to clean up the potential mess he will bring with him.

I guess that is the point of my taking on this mission of writing; to use this as a place to organize my thoughts around the struggle.

I have already stepped into 2017 like Beyonce at the Superbowl. I could have written this quietly in a diary, but I chose a very public way of expression. I DO want things to change. I HAVE taken the first step in making that happen. And as I said before, things change every day, I am now just learning how to take control of that.

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