Crying for you

Original photograph by Tracey Rediker RedLincArt

I often cry when I write. I cry because something I have written is real. It is cathartic to see the truth in words in front of you.

I also cry when I write something phoney. I cry from embarrassment. I did that a lot more often last year then I have in my whole life. I have learned my lesson and it will not happen again.

So here I am, writing every day, and crying every day. Is this a good thing? Does forcing myself to think about the things that make me fearful and unhappy serve anyone? what am I trying to accomplish?

I want to believe that by exploring my own pain I will come out on the other side of this with something. Maybe it will be insight into my struggle and an answer to my sorrow. Maybe it will inform my friends and family about why I haven’t been able to give them what they need from me. Maybe I will find purpose.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s